The Funeral.

Dulcie's Funeral was held at the Great Southern Memorial Park near Mount Cotton and was at 12 noon today.Today was a beautiful sunny day and she would have loved that.She has a large family and so there was a good turnout to send her off. Terry's boys were there and three of Shirley's sons and Danny's sons had come down from Bundaberg. Dulcie has two granddaughters, the lovely Shelly who got married in May and who has now embarked upon a road trip and is currently up in Airlie Beach and  Phoebe, Will's daughter. Shelly couldn't be with us today but was with us in spirit while Deranie and Phoebe had flown up from Sydney.Also there were Dulcie's lovely neighbours. Debra from Blue Care who used to shower her on Fridays came as did Julie who used to cut the grass. Andrew, his mum Con and Ros were there. Anne and Pauline, who work with Will, came.There were lots of people from the Maclean area including Tracy who drove up this morning and relatives of some of Dulcie's siblings including her niece Perces.The Memorial Chapel was practically full by the time we all filed in. One wall was all windows with water constantly streaming down them.Will and I sat found a seat at the front and Phoebe sat between us.Dulcie's simple wooden coffin sat on a raised area at the front with a beautiful arrangement of cream gladioli on the top and a framed copy of the photo I had taken of her.The service started with the song 'Take me home country roads' by John Denver before the celebrant Jake came and stood at the lectern at the front.He read the eulogy that the family had written.He talked of her birth in 1923 in Brooloo, nr Imbil. She was the second youngest of 11 children and was the last of them left.Though she wasn't highly educated she was a great reader and imparted that love of reading to her children.He talked of her love of horses and riding, of the outdoors and getting her hands in the earth. She was a country girl at heart loving the fresh air and being in the bush. She loved panning for gold and fossicking for gems.He talked of how her house was always open and how she loved to bake biscuits for others, her love of cards and how she taught her children and grandchildren to play cards but took no prisoners when playing them. She loved the Bronco and watching  the Virginian and Bonanza.She lived much of her life in various places in the Mary Valley but when she moved to Celtis St she said she would never move again and that they would have to carry her out in a box. She got her wish and died peacefully in her own home.Above all though she was a wonderful, loving mother, grandmother and great grandmother.Jake asked if anyone would like to come up and say anything. No one did which was no reflection upon her she just really did not want any fuss.There then followed a moment of reflection to the stains of an instrumental version of 'My Heart Will Go On' from the film Titanic. I tried to contemplate all the happy times that I had had with Dulcie but could only picture a sinking ship! No matter I will have plenty of time to reflect later.Next Jake read the poem ' She is Gone.'

You can shed tears that she is gone

Or you can smile because she lived

You can close your eyes and pray that she will come back

Or you can open your eyes and see that she has left

Your heart can be empty because you can't see her

Or you can be full of the love that you shared

You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday

Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday

You can remember her and only that she is gone

Or you can cherish her memory and let it live on

You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back

Or you can do what she would want and smile, open your eyes, love and go on.

As we finally said 'Goodbye' and the curtains closed in front of her coffin Johhny Cash and June Carter sang "Peace in the Valley" before we were ushered back out into the sunshine.Following the service we all drove down to Skinner's Park beside the Logan River, where there were light refreshments and drinks. Dulcie would have loved it with the sun and being outdoors.It was lovely to meet so many people that I had heard of and never met but who felt they knew me from their reading of this blog.As the people began to drift away those left finally took Dulcie's gladioli flower arrangement down to the river and cast the flowers into the water and watched them drift away. It was very moving and lovely though I am not so sure that the two fisherman fishing on the jetty appreciated it as much as we did.I am sure Dulcie would have liked it and that is all that matters.

An Aside.

By the way, in the midst of all that has happened this week, Centrelink finally deposited the money they owed me into my bank account yesterday.It was such a long battle and with everything else going on I could hardly raise a smile.

The Bearers of Sad News.

I got four hours sleep last night with things going through my mind but at least Will slept well.I was up and had the washing machine on even before I got dressed. We remade Dulcie's bed and tidied her room knowing Terry, who was flying up from Tasmania, would want to spend some time in there.When all was ready we headed off to Wendi's in Roxy, and then all three of us headed north in Wendi's car on the drive to Tewantin to break the news to Cuttie.It was about a 2 hour drive and we arrived at Noosa North Shore just after midday.

We got fish and chips by the river for lunch and then drove to the Aged Care Village where Cuttie now lives.The village had different housing blocks with about 8 residents in each who had their own room and bathroom. Cuttie was in MacDonald House.She was asleep on her bed and when quietly calling her name didn't work Wendi gently roused her. She was pleased to see us as we said hello and then she said,"Where's your Mum?"Wendi told her that she had died yesterday. Whether she didn't hear properly or just couldn't take it in I don't know but she said "Where is she?"Wendi told her again and then it sank in.She was so upset. They had been best friends for years and years. She was just stunned and shocked and there were long, heavy moments of silence as you could see her thinking about and remembering times past with Dulcie.We had to go and see her in person as it would have been awful to ring and then think of her, after the call, alone in her room.There was some sobbing and lot's of reminiscing and more long silences."She loved her children," said Cuttie."Yes, she always said she had no favourites," said Wendi."Yes, she used to say that to me, " said Cuttie, " She was such a big liar."She had to lie down as she was not having such a good day as far as pain went."Well, I will be joining my good friend soon," she said getting upset again."She'll be waiting with the kettle on," I said, and probably smoking a cigarette now we are not around to stop her."We stayed with her about 2 hours. At one point a nurse came in to give her some medication and I told the nurse that we had just delivered some sad news and could she keep an eye on Cuttie for the day?"Are you alright Blanche?" she asked. I was not convinced of her concern.It was hard to leave her but we said we would be back again soon. I showed her this picture,

and she loved it and I said we would print it out and bring it back for her.Will told the woman at reception exactly what we told the nurse and that we were concerned and could someone keep an eye on her after hearing the sad news." Did you tell the nurse?" said the woman."Yes" said Will."Well, she will keep an eye on her." She was so hard faced with no compassion that I could have slapped her."Cold hearted bitch" I muttered as we walked out, channelling Dulcie.We called to see Bill and Nancy, old neighbours of Cuttie's who regularly visit her. I had heard about them often but never met them and I was shocked to see how old they were. Nancy was 94 and apparently Bill was older! He reminded me of The Major from Fawlty Towers and had two hearing aids in.At first they did not recognise Wendi but soon realised who she was. We were invited in and told them the sad news and they were very sorry too."And how do you two chaps fit in?" asked Bill."Well, I am Wendi's brother and Dulcie's son," said Will "and this is my partner, Nick.""Oh, it's your father," said Bill.No one corrected him and I was mortified that I could look old enough to be Will's father and then was desperately trying so hard not burst out laughing at such a serious time.Nancy was talking now but I wasn't listening as I tried to contain my giggles and I just sat there grinning madly, stifling the laughter and nodding as I pretended to be listening to what she was saying. It was only then then that I realised she was talking about her sister having a stroke. I kept on nodding and quickly changed my grin to a look of concern.We didn't stay too long after that and set off on the two hour journey back to Brisbane and arrived home about 6.30 pm.All Dulcie's children were in her house together tonight to write Dulcie's eulogy for the Celebrant on Friday.Heck, I hope I can get some sleep tonight.

Dulcie Elizabeth Rodgers.

5th of March 1923 to 11th August 2015.

'Parting is such sweet sorrow.'

Dulcie is leaving us.The last few days have been amazing, horrible, wonderful, distressing and comforting She has been surrounded by her wonderful family and showered with love and kisses. So many lovely things have been said and it has been an emotional rollercoaster."I always thought I had a lovely family but you have all proved it," she said from her bed.As I knelt beside her in bed over the weekend and held her left hand she lifted her right arm with the little strength she had left and put it round my shoulders and said "I love you Nick.""I love you too" I said failing miserably not to cry.The house was filled with music as Will and Tracy played on harp, guitar and mandolin.Dulcie listened from her bed and loved it. Will had played the harp when they scattered his father's ashes up at Yabba, the place where Dulcie and her husband first lived together."Do you remember at Yabba?" She asked him. He nodded. "I'l be up there soon," she said."Do you want to go to Yabba?" I asked to make sure and in typical Dulcie style she replied."I don't give a bugger where you put me."Yesterday a palliative care doctor, Liz and a nurse, Amber came to our rescue and gave us the support and help we had needed all weekend.Liz knelt by Dulcie's bed and took her hand and talked to her. She asked her what Dulcie wanted and Dulcie was able to say that she didn't want to go to hospital. Liz asked how she felt and Dulcie said that she was 'going downhill'."Yes" said Liz, " I don't think you have very much longer to live Dulcie. Are you scared?"She shook her head.Dulcie was able to tell her herself that she didn't want to go to hospital."Well, it's a deal Dulcie. You are not going to hospital."Amber said the house had a lovely presence about it as she got the medications ready.They fitted her up to a pump that slowly releases medication to make her more comfortable and Amber showed me how to administer extra doses of medication to help her combat pain, nausea or breathlessness as needed and Dulcie went to sleep.It is now 9.00 am and Dulcie has been asleep since yesterday lunchtime but she is peaceful, calm and quiet and her 92 (though she would say 93) year old heart and lungs will not give up just yet. I think she is catching up on all the sleep she has missed over the last months. She is breathing steadily and every now and again exhales loudly and makes our hearts skip a beat before she takes another breath again.A nurse is coming later to see her.......and wouldn't you just know it.........after all that, it turns out that the best people in these situations are from Blue Care..........Doh!